A river valley doesn’t appear overnight. It’s formed through geological processes that take millions of years. And it goes through several distinct stages in this time.
At the start, the river is at the mercy of the environment. It owes its very existence to quirks of geography. The terrain is master of it’s motion and nature. It’s the existance of some sort of channel that upgraded it from yet another stagnant puddle into a flowing body of water.
But, gradually, the balance of power starts to change.
As the river flows, it erodes.
It carves out curves where it snakes through the surroundings. It settles into its groove as it shapes its own space in a playful game back and forth with the landscape.
As it goes over and over the same channel, it deepens it. Ever so slowly. But inexorably.
Until the river is now the one bending the environment to its will. It no searches for one course out of thousands possible in a wide expanse. Instead, the river has found its route — and made it so deep and strong that it calls the shots.
Given enough time the river goes further still.
It carves out huge valleys and canyons over hundreds of thousands of years. Until this force of water has completely reshaped the environment — the main outstanding features are entirely the work of the river itself. Everything else now sits in response to the landscape that the river has created. The river defines the landscape.
Resolve to do the same with your character and your life.
We start out influenced by our environment. By external opinions, friends and peers, cultures, and all that.
Just like a young river, our insights and ideas begin life as uncertain channels. They change course with each new season. The rains come and the flow of water finds whatever channel is favoured by external influences right now.
But we don’t have to stay this way forever.
Like the river, we can start to play with those external forces. Push back a little here and there. Experiment with finding different grooves. Ride the currents and steer skillfully rather than being completely at their mercy.
And, over time, your channel will become deep enough for you to stand firm in your identity. And you’ll develop agency to shape your surroundings like the river does.
When your wisdom, or insight is sharp and clear… When your principles are strong and authentic… When your passion and enthusiasm burns for all the world to see…
Those sorts of things are noticed by the people around you. They start to exert an influence — slowly — through your continued presence and unwavering purpose over the years.
Your convictions and your unique style needs to be grooved out over time until you can see it for what it is. Until they’re deep and consistent.
The key to doing this (if you want to) is to understand the seasons — and the give and take.
Start out by accepting many of the outer influences. Try them out and see which fit you. Then, over time, choose a couple to absorb and hold at your core (for the current season of your life, at least). Go deep with them and truly own them — like the river doesn’t constantly shift to different paths, but gouges out its one channel over and over.
Until you’re no longer being shaped by the world around you. Instead, your constancy, certainty, and depth of purpose is what influences environments and people around you.