Only one decision in life actually matters.
Or, more precisely, it’s a single decision that you make over and over again.
That decision is: “How do I choose to use my time?”. Because, at the end of the day, there’s nothing else that you truly own. And once a sliver of time has slipped by you can never get it back.
But it’s easy to let ourselves off the hook, and apply this attitude to only a small portion of our life — then let “circumstances” dictate the rest of our time allocation on our behalf. Seneca did a great job of emphasizing just how strict and ruthless you need to be about this:
“When some state or other offered Alexander a part of its territory and half of all its property he told them that ‘he hadn’t come to Asia with the intention of accepting whatever they cared to give him, but of letting them keep whatever he chose to leave them.’ Philosophy, likewise, tells all other occupations: ‘It’s not my intention to accept whatever time is leftover from you; you shall have, instead, what I reject.’ Give your whole mind to her.”
[“Philosophy” here is not the academic pursuit we usually take it to mean today. Seneca is talking about the practical art of dedicating yourself to the pursuit of a happy and meaningful life.]
But even if you accept the challenging amount of discipline required by this insight, it’s worryingly easy to remain on the superficial surface. And fail to appreciate what’s really going on…
To use your time wisely, it’s not enough to schedule the most important activities and exclude everything else from your calendar. It’s not even enough that you show up promptly for all your appointments (rather than having your calendar tell a fairytale story of who you’d like to be… While the trail of missed appointments says something else altogether).
You need to give your full attention to those carefully chosen activities. To be totally present.
Because how we use our time is not really tied to our location in the physical world. “We” are our minds. That’s the only place where information from the outside world reaches us.
So what it all comes down to in the end is what you attend to in the moment.
If you’re daydreaming, then that’s what you’re giving your time to right now. If you’re worrying, then that’s how you’ve chosen to spend your days.
So, while the first step is indeed to plan carefully how to use your time… The second step — and the true work — is to notice where you really ARE in every given moment, and bring your attention back to the desired point.
Many people have already (quite reasonably) observed: “Show me your calendar and I’ll tell you what your priorities are”. If we could look inside the mind, we’d go one step further and ask to observe people’s focus before assessing their priorities.